Confessions of a Grinch

Maybe Christmas doesn't come from a store,
Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.
-Dr. Suess' "How the Grinch Stole Christmas!"

If I am honest, I've been a bit of a "Grinch" the past few Christmases. It has been a struggle to see that Christmas doesn't come from a store. I know it doesn't. Looking past all the glitz, glam, "Pins" and calendar events hasn't been that easy.

I have struggled with "shoulds." I should decorate a tree and put up lights. I should buy <insert name> a gift. I should bake Christmas cookies. I should offer to host the event. I should sponsor a family and be generous. None of these things are bad when they come from the right place, however, we are pelted with messages about what the holidays "should" be like.

Messages from businesses trying to increase sales. Messages from family trying to uphold traditions. Messages from the church about honouring the true meaning of the season. Attempting to live up to these perceived expectations often leaves me overwhelmed and struggling to balance all the expectations of the season. Holiday pressure is real. We talk about it, but I don't know if we know what to do about it.

This year my family has found ourselves in a position of less. We have had to budget more carefully. Our position of having less money to spend on the holidays has helped us prioritize and better filter the competing messages. I am looking forward to December the most I have in a long time.

I, personally, am doing less too. Fewer commitments. Less food to prepare. Fewer presents. Less stress. More time. More love. The "Grinches" and the "Scrooges" don't always need conformity - just space and love and grace, especially when the glamour of the season may allow people's pain to fall into shadow. This, of course, has me thinking about Christians.

In reading the book of Haggai, I am stirred over the prophet's message of stinginess and misplaced priorities.

“This is what the Lord of Heaven’s Armies says: The people are saying, ‘The time has not yet come to rebuild the house of the Lord.’” -Haggai 1:2 (NLT)

I don't want to be so busy doing the "Christmas things" or even the "Christian things" that I miss an opportunity for God to grow my heart or someone else's heart. I have learned that having a margin in my life allows for opportunity, creativity and provides the needed space for my relationships to grow.

Maybe Jesus isn't found on Sunday, you see,
In the same way, Christmas isn't found in a tree.

Maybe His Love isn't found in a building at all,
And rebuilding the "house" of our heart is the call.

Help me to let go of these worldly expectations,
That Your Love and Light may have enunciation.